O2Final Draft, Inc. Final Draft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nt. Dwaynes house - morning On a bed, we see the outline of a normal boy in the covers...except there is a long pointy object protruding up where his head would be. An ALARM CLOCK goes off. After a few annoying BEEPS, the outline begins to stir. With a lazy swoop the boy reaches to turn off the alarm and knocks the alarm clock off the table. It CRASHES to the floor. The boy sits up, his pillow attached to his head. He pulls the pillow off his head in a flurry of feathers to reveal a UNICORN HORN. This is DWAYNE. Dwayne stumbles into the bathroom. He looks into the mirror. The top of the mirror is scratched and broken. He brushes his teeth and then his horn. In the shower, his horn sticks out above the curtain. Back in his bedroom, Dwayne begins to put on a shirt. When he walks out the shirt is covered in holes near the top of the collar. Dwayne makes toast in the kitchen. When the toast ejects out of the toaster, it gets impaled on Dwaynes horn. Eventually he makes it down to his living room and starts watching TV. Anytime we see anything on TV in Unicorn Boy it is video footage of real people, and this newscast is no exception. It looks like it is coming from the set of ICTVs NewsWatch 16. There is an animated picture of a dolphin in a box shot. Dwayne is only half-listening. Newscaster ...to which the Governor replied, quote, Ahhh, my eyes! For the love of God, my eyes! More on this at eleven. In other news, the Roy Scheider Memorial Aquarium is proud to announce a new addition to their aquatic arsenal: a bottlenose dolphin. Thats right folks, Americas favorite fish is now a permanent resident in our very own town! To welcome the friendly sea dweller, the aquarium will be kicking of a week of Dolphin Mania, where local students will get a chance to meet the dolphin first hand...or should I say, flipper? Ha ha ha. Back to you, Clark. A school bus pulls up in front of Dwaynes house. Dwayne sees it through the window and sighs. 000200000CA2000007CCC9C,Int. school hallway - morning The school is abuzz with talk about the new dolphin. Dolphin-related signs and streamers adorn the hallway, and all of the children excitedly chatter about dolphins. We overhear bits of conversation. Molly Oh my god, did you hear about the new dolphin? Dolphins are soooo cute! Mollys Friend O M G! I know! MOLLY Oh gross... Here comes that freak with a horn, dont look at him... Dwayne and Perry walk past the gossiping hussies. They continue to pass by many Dolphin Mania signs. Perry Dwayne! Do you have any idea what this means? Dwayne Perry-- PERRY Listen, the navy trains dolphins to breach the hulls of spy submarines! Theres a ship coming into port tomorrow carrying rare Star Trek Deep Space Nine trading cards. Now these are special edition Klingon versus Cardassian cards. Do you see where Im going with this? Dwayne No... PERRY We could teach this dolphin to break into the cargo ship. There were only three thousand packs made! And they could be ours! Dwayne is not convinced. Come on, trading cards! From Star Trek! Deep Space 9! Dwayne Perry, Im not going to help you kidnap the dolphin. Especially not for some stupid trading cards. PERRY We dont have to steal it, we just have to train it to break free on its own...and then swim to the harbor and collect our trading cards. They would never know it was us! Dwayne, only half-listening, notices something down the hallway. DWAYNE Oh no, not again... FAT TOM lumbers in. Fat Tom HEY! Horn head, did you hear about the new dolphin? Dwayne Why is everyone so obsessed with this dolphin?? Fat Tom Hey! Leave the dolphin alone! You narwhal! DWAYNE (beat) Whats a narwhal? The balloon attached to Toms wrist pulls an easel and diagram out of a locker and starts lecturing in what we hear as a series of balloon noises. The balloon is subtitled so we can understand what it is saying. Squeaks A narwhal is an arctic whale with a horn growing out of its head. Their horns gave rise to the myth of unicorns during the Middle Ages. You can see how you and a narwhal are similar and perhaps understand his thought process behind likening you to one. DWAYNE Wow, thats actually surprisingly rational of you. fat tom SHUT UP NERD!! The bully punches Dwayne in the stomach and walks away. CuT TO: INT. school Nurses office - dAY Dwayne and Perry are standing in the waiting room of the nurses office, talking as people walk past. They are waiting for Dwayne to be able to see the nurse. Perry Youve got to admit that for a balloon hes got a powerful command of the English language. DWAYNE I wish he didnt have such a powerful command of his fist. At that moment, a beautiful girl walks past. She has a halo glowing behind her and a choir singing oohs in the background. As she continues to move, we realize that the halo was really just a large light behind her and the oohs were someone holding a boombox playing a tape of angels singing. DWAYNE (contd) Oh. My. God. Mollys incredible. PERRY Molly? Yeah, I guess shes alright, I mean compared to Yuffie from Final Fantasy Seven, shes still just an average girl, but if she started carrying around a sword she could be kind of good looking. 000200000CDE00001468CD8,DWAYNE Do you think shed ever go with me to the school dance? PERRY Why wouldnt you just take Melissa instead, I mean she is your girlfriend after all. DWAYNE How many times do I have to tell you, shes not my girlfriend! She just tells everyone she is because shes stalking me. Plus, shes in first grade! PERRY Sounds like someones got a crush! DWAYNE Do you even listen to what I say anymore? PERRY What? Oh sorry, I was looking at these tongue depressers. InT. School cafeteria - day MOLLY is standing in line to get food. DWAYNE comes up behind her. As they talk they make their way down the lunch line. Dwayne Hey. Molly Hi... DWAYNE Im Dwayne. MOLLY Yeah I know I sit right next to you. And theres a name tag on your desk. And youre wearing a shirt that says Its a Dwayne kind of day! DWAYNE Oh yeah. I forgot. So...uh...its meat in a bowl day thats pretty exciting, huh? MOLLY No, not really in fact Im a vegetarian. DWAYNE You dont eat meat? Even bacon? Cause thats a mighty tasty meat! MOLLY No we dont eat bacon At this point a lunch lady hands Dwayne and Molly each a tray. Dwaynes has an unidentifiable meat in a bowl next to a small plate of corn. Mollys tray has only a plate of corn. DWAYNE You know corn is the yellowest vegtable... MOLLY (interrupting him) Did Ashley put you up to this? DWAYNE (confused) Uh...whos Ashley and up to what? MOLLY That tramp has always been jealous of me. You know I work really hard, I make honor roll, I play three sports, Im on the year book staff, I always get the lead in the school play, Im a cheerleader and I have to do it all while looking this good. And I dont need some freak with a cone on his head... DWAYNE (timidly interrupting) Actually its a horn. MOLLY I dont care if its the Eifel Tower, its not a dolphin and its not cute! I dont need some weirdo retard hanging around me and making me look uncool. So why dont you go back to whatever side show you wandered off from and leave me alone. She storms off. Dwayne stands there with a blank look on his face. DWAYNE Maybe I knew I should have gone with Wow your tray sure is corny! INT. classroom - day Kids sit in their chairs facing the teacher. The teachers voice sounds like the muted trumpet noise when teachers speak in Charlie Brown. The boys sit listening intently to the teacher as we pan towards the front of the classroom. When we can finally see the teacher, we only see her from the waist down. The trumpet noise goes on for a few more moments then she puts down a muted trumpet. Teacher Ok, that does it for our music lesson today. (beat) Weve got a very special trip planned for tomorrow, were going to go see the new dolphin at the aquarium. So remember to get those permission slips signed by your parents or if you think that they would not want you taking a day off from school to go look at a dolphin, I need you to forge their signatures. You can even just put their initials. I really dont care. Any questions? DWAYNE Excuse me, maam, but what educational purpose does this trip serve? TEACHER Well Im glad you asked that Dwayne. (beat) Any other questions? (beat) Ok, class dismissed! CuT TO: INT. dwaynes house - day Dwayne are Perry are sitting around on Dwaynes couch talking. 00020000088C00002140886,PerrY I dont understand why you dont just call Molly. DWAYNE Youre saying this like its really easy, like youre the master at asking out girls... PERRY As a matter of fact, Dwayne, I am the webmaster of a professional dating website, Perrys Date Site dot Geocities dot com. At this point, we see a screen shot of Perrys website... It looks terrible. DWAYNE How many people have actually gotten dates from your website, Perry? PERRY For your information, it was my website that helped set up the substitute teacher with the janitor last year. Yep, we matched them according to 39 individual personality traits, they were our most successful couple ever. DWAYNE Didnt he try to kill her? PERRY What? Oh that? That had nothing to do with the website, he was just crazy. DWAYNE Alright, but anyway, I cant call Molly, what if I get her answering machine? PERRY Then you just leave a message... DWAYNE You dont understand, I am terrible at leaving messages. PERRY Nah, you can do it, just give it a try, like Han Solo always said, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Dwayne picks up the phone and dials. We hear it ringing and then Mollys voicemail picks up. Mollys Voicemail Hi, its me, Molly, if you want to talk about field hockey or boys, please leave a message and Ill get right back to you. If you want to ask me out on a date, leave your name, number, annual income after taxes, approximate body type and favorite flavor of ice cream and Ill have my people contact you about the application process. Bye! DWAYNE Hi Molly, its me, Dwayne. From school. Im the one with the horn. On my head. Well anyway, you might be asking yourself why is Dwayne calling me? and thats a perfectly valid question, but maybe youre not asking yourself that and then I would just have to wonder whether you expected me to call sooner or later or maybe you just get a lot of calls from a lot of guys so it doesnt surprise you anymore when random guys call. I didnt mean to imply like youre slutty or anything, I just think youre probably really popular with the guys around school and not because Ive heard anything or anything like that, Im just saying, thats all. 0002000005F3000029C65ED,(beat) So, how are you doing? Im doing pretty good. Ooh, my neighbors walking his dog past my house right now. The funny thing about this neighbor is that once his dog got loose and its collar fell off and we found it and thought it was a stray so we took it inside and gave it food and water and then he was looking for the dog for two days and finally we figured out that it was his dog and we gave it back to him. (beat) Well, anyway, I should probably be going because I have some homework I need to do. Not that Im a bookworm or anything, I just like to stay on top of my homework so that I dont have to do it all on the weekend. Yeah. So, I guess Ill see you around. (beat) Yep. (beat) Alright, well Ill talk to you later. (beat) Bye. Dwayne hangs up the phone. Perry has a look of utter shock on his face. PERRY That... Was... GENIUS!! Girls love dogs! DWAYNE Did I just call her slutty? Ext. Street - outside of dwaynes house - day Dwayne is standing in front of his house, distraught that Molly has rejected him. We hear the JINGLE of an ice cream truck approaching. The truck roles into frame, the words Tasty Ice Cream are painted on its side. It is being driven by an ICE CREAM MAN with a handlebar mustache. He appears to be naked, but we can see only his upper body through the window of the truck. Ice cream man Hey there Dwayne, hows it all hangin out? Dwayne (sulkily) Oh, hey Ice Cream Man. ICE CREAM MAN Would you like a popsicle? Ive got special dolphin popsicles this week. 00020000075300002FB374D,Ice Cream Man holds up a dolphin-shaped POPSICLE with a striking resemblance to a dildo. Ice CREAM MAN (contd) I know how much you kids like to suck on dolphins. DWAYNE No thanks, I dont really like dolphins all that much. ICE CREAM MAN What? Dont like dolphins!? But theyre natures most beautiful animal! (lovingly) With their smooth, sleak dorsal fin, stiff bottle-nose, supple yet firm blowhole... DWAYNE Um... ICE CREAM MAN ...I can imagine it...Me and the dolphins, swimming through the misty surf, our warm bodies grinding together as we tumble through the waves...gently caressing her flipper... DWAYNE Ice Cream Man, you really like dolphins, dont you? ICE CREAM MAN Well, who doesnt? You know what they say -- The key to a womans heart is through the blowhole of a dolphin. DWAYNE Ive never heard that before. Did you learn that one when you were in Vietnam? ICE CREAM MAN Oh, its an old saying -- a Viet Cong prostitute whispered that in my ear during a moment of shear passion. Of course it was in Vietnamese and I didnt get to ask her what it meant before I called in the napalm airstrike. I found out the translation later in Phnom Pen. God I miss her lips. (He is lost in thought but then snaps back to reality) Well, off to my next stop. See you later Dwayne! Ice Cream Man merrily drives off, leaving Dwayne standing alone in the street. DWAYNE (to himself) The key to a womans heart is through the blowhole of a dolphin... Thats it! Molly doesnt like me because I dont like dolphins! I just have to show her how much I like dolphins, and then shell be mine! Ext. Aquarium - night Dwayne and Perry are outside the aquarium late at night. Both of them are wearing cat burglar suits, and Perry has a pair of night vision goggles similar to Sam Fishers in Splinter Cell. There is a ventilation duct low to the ground. 0002000005F0000037005EA,Perry I knew youd come around, Dwayne! DWAYNE Actually Perry... Im gonna train the dolphin to hold up this sign at the field trip tomorrow. Dwayne pulls out a poorly-made poster with Molly will U go out with me? -Dwayne written in crayon. As soon as Molly sees it shell fall in love with me! And whatever you do, youre not going to screw it up. PERRY Dont worry, dolphins are smart. We can teach it to hold up your sign and break free, swim to the harbor, breach the hull of the cargo ship, steal the cards and drop them at our secret drop-off point. Plus jump through flaming hoops and play beach volleyball. DWAYNE Cant you wait until after the field trip? PERRY But the Klingon vs. Cardassian trading card shipment comes in TOMORROW! DWAYNE Please, Perry. You know how much this means to me. You dont need those cards. PERRY But...but... DWAYNE Perry, please. Perry seems empathetic for a moment, but then a sly grin creeps across a face. Perry (obviously lying) Okay, just for you, Dwayne. I wont train the dolphins to steal those cards. Wink, wink. DWAYNE Did you just said Wink, wink? PERRY Its just a figure of speech. DWAYNE Whatever. Lets go train this fish. PERRY Actually, a dolphin is an aquatic mammal. DWAYNE Lets go! Perry and Dwayne both rush for the door, and end up tripping on their way in. They lay in pain for a moment, then get up and enter. Int. Aquarium - dolphin tank - night The dolphin happily chatters and jumps in and out of the water, Ecco The Dolphin style. 00020000063900003CEA633,Out of nowhere, Ice Cream Man drives into the frame. Hes driving an ice cream boat. The dolphin is surprised to see Ice Cream Man, but then warms up and begins chattering and jumping again. Ice CREAM MAN Hey dollface. I mean, dolphin. The dolphin makes a gleeful dolphin chitter. Ice CREAM MAN (contd) You wanna come up on the deck here? I could give you a nice swabbin. (Beat) You know, dolphins are the only animal that has sex for pleasure. (Beat) Baby, youre just like a trophy fish -- I don't know whether to eat you, or to mount you. Across the room, Perry and Dwayne bust out of the other end of the ventilation duct. Perry Here we are Dwayne! Dwayne Allright, lets-- (notices Ice Cream Man) Ice cream man! What are you doing here? Ice Cream Man is just as surprised to see Dwayne as Dwayne is to see him. Ice cream man (Evasively) Well hello boys. I uh... volunteer here at the zoo...at night. I take care of the dolphin. But you cant tell anyone, because its supposed to be a big surprise. DWAYNE Um... okay. Ice Cream Man holds up two dolphin-shaped POPSICLES. ICE CREAM MAN You boys want some dolphin pops? Theyre on the house. DWAYNE No thanks, I think well just-- ICE CREAM MAN Allrighty then boys, nice to see you. I have to go fill out some, um, dolphin paper work. Remember, you didnt see me here. Big surprise, right? Ice Cream Man quickly exits in his ice cream boat. Perry Nows our chance! Lets train this dolphin! Dwayne Okay, here we go. This is for you, Molly! Dwayne pulls out a book: Dolphin Training In 15 Minutes Or Less. Fade to: 0002000003A40000431D39E,Key on black: 15 Minutes Later Fade in: INT. aquarium - DOLPHIN TANK - night Dwayne Well, that was easy. Lets see it, Flipper! Dwayne blows a single burst on his whistle. The dolphin does a series of elaborate jumps and tricks, and at the end jumps into the air holding Dwaynes Molly will U go out with me? sign. Fireworks go off just as the dolphin makes its final leap. Dwayne (contd) Perfect! FaDE TO BLACK. This is where the Intermission of the show will go! Fade in: INT. sCHOOL - dAY Its the next day at school. Dwayne approaches Molly to talk to her about the upcoming field trip. DWAYNE Hi Molly. (she ignores him) Remember me? Its a Dwayne kind of day? Corn is the yellowest vegetable? Molly I remember you Dwayne. DWAYNE You do? MOLLY Yeah, youre the big dork that filled up my answering machine tape. Thanks to you I missed an important phone call from my modeling agency! DWAYNE Youre a model? 000200000685000046BB67F,MOLLY Of course. Im starting off doing ear modeling, but my agent says that by the end of the year I should be doing forehead modeling. DWAYNE Wooooow. You have a really nice forehead. MOLLY What would you know about nice foreheads? Youve got a spike growing out of yours! DWAYNE Its actually not a spike, its a... A popular girl calls Molly on her cell phone. MOLLY Ok yeah, Ill be right over. What? Oh no, Im not talking to anyone. She walks away. DWAYNE Ok, see you at the field trip! Int. Aquarium - day The aquarium is packed with people excited to see the dolphin. They are seated on bleachers surrounding the dolphin tank. Huge signs saying Dolphin Mania! and Dolph-IN YOUR FACE! and other catchy lame dolphin slogans adorn the walls, and streamers and colored balloons are draped on every surface. On the side, we see Ice Cream Mans truck parked, selling concessions. However, the words Tasty Ice Cream are crossed out and Hot Dogs is hastily written above it. Ice Cream Man is wearing dark sunglasses and a trench coat and appears to be in disguise. Molly is wearing her I <3 Dolphins shirt. She is sitting next to her friend, another stuck-up, prissy girl. MollY Oh my god, Im so excited! Dolphins are like my favorite animal of all time! Perry and Dwayne sit next to each other in the front row. Both are nervous for different reasons, and both have whistles on strings around their necks. Dwayne Okay, Ive planted the sign and the fireworks are set to go off. Now we just have to wait for the perfect moment. Perry eyes his HI-TECH DIGITAL WATCH. On the view screen is a small radar device, but nothing is showing up. 00020000062100004D3A61B,Perry Hopefully that moment comes soon, Dwayne... A DOLPHIN TRAINER in khaki zookeeper apparel walks on to a platform near the edge of the dolphin tank. She is energetic and upbeat. Dolphin trainer Welcome to the Roy Scheider Memorial Aquarium! Youre all in for a treat, because today Im proud to introduce you to Dexter, our brand new bottle-nosed dolphin! She tosses a FISH into the tank from a bucket on the platform. The dolphin jumps into the air, catches the fish and does several elaborate tricks. The crowd oohs and ahhs. MollY Wow! Thats so cute! Ice Cream Man stares longingly at the dolphin. ICE CREAM MAN (saucy) Great job Dexter! The dolphin sticks his head out of the water and does a happy dolphin laugh. Dolphin trainer Next, Dexter would like to show you a new move hes been working on. The dolphin trainer pulls a lever on the edge of the aquarium and two flaming hoops drop from the ceiling. DOLPHIN TRAINER (contd) He will jump through these flaming rings! The crowd gasps. Dwayne nervously stands up. Nobody notices him except for Perry. Perry looks at his Hi-Tech watch again. He gets a surprised look on his face. Dwayne (to himself) Here goes nothing. Dwayne begins approaches the Dolphin Trainers platform, still unnoticed. DOLPHIN TRAINER Dexter, are you ready? The dolphin coos and does a dolphin nod from in the water. PERRYS WATCH begins blinking and a high-pitched alarm SOUNDS. The watchs view screen shows a radar image of a ship driving into harbor, and blinks with the message Shipment now entering harbor! 0002000009950000535598F,DolPHIN TRAINER (contd) Allright Dexter, on three! MollY Go Dexter! DOLPHIN TRAINER 3!.... Dwayne gulps, now at the edge of the platform. DolpHIN TRAINER (contd) 2!... Just before the Dolphin Trainer says 1! Dwayne rushes out. Dwayne Wait!!! DOLPHIN TRAINER Huh? DWAYNE I have something to say. The crowd goes silent. Inspirational music begins to play. DwaYNE (contd) Theres a girl out there in the audience tonight that, well, that I really like. Shes kind, funny and the most beautiful girl in the whole Middle School and one time I saw her at lunch and she was eating a turkey sandwich, I remember it was turkey because I made a joke to myself that was something like I wish I wasnt such a turkey so that I could talk to you and it was funny to me but also sad at the same time and I thought about telling it to her but then I thought that maybe she would think it was too forward or maybe she wouldnt get the joke, not that shes dumb or anything, I think shes pretty smart actually, she sat behind me in math and we passed our tests back one time and I wasnt trying to look but I accidentally saw her grade and she got a 78 and thats a little better than average if you assume that average is around 70, so Id say shes smart too... Someone in the audience loudly clears his throat. DWAYNE (contd) I guess Im just trying to say that shes a terrific person, and Id do anything to be her boyfriend. (dramatic pause) Molly Spencer, this is for you! Dwayne blows a single burst on his whistle. Molly is shocked. The music swells as the dolphin begins an elaborate slow-motion jump, through both flaming hoops. Everything happens in slow-motion as the dolphin sails across the aquarium. Members of the crowd -- Molly and her friend, the Punks, Ice Cream Man watch in wide-eyed amazement. As the dolphin soars through the air, Dwaynes sign falls from the ceiling and the dolphin catches it in its mouth. Molly sees the sign and smiles. Dwayne smiles and turns toward Molly. Their eyes meet. Molly nods in answer to the question on Dwaynes sign. Perry looks again at his watch. The view screen is now flashing Ship preparing to leave harbor!! The dolphin continues to soar toward Molly, still doing flips with Dwaynes sign held firmly in its mouth. This is the longest and most stunning jump ever. Perry stands up and raises his WHISTLE to his lips. Dwayne begins to run toward Molly to meet her in a warm embrace. 00020000062200005CE461C,Just as Dwayne reaches the bleachers, Perry blows his whistle two times. Time suddenly returns to normal. The dolphin, in mid-flight, drops straight into the tank with a sickening SLAP. His eyes go red and he starts choking on Dwaynes sign and convulsing. Perry blows a third time, and the dolphin, now a crazed beast, jumps out of the water and smashes through the window right in front of Molly and Dwayne. The crowd erupts in concern. Perry Oops... MollY Oh my God! The dolphin! DWAYNE Youve got to be kidding me. The dolphin is lying on the floor, convulsing and foaming at the mouth. Dwaynes sign is still around its neck. A sickening GURGLE comes from the dolphins mouth. Ice Cream Man looks incredibly concerned. He begins driving his truck, which now no longer says Hot Dogs or Tasty Ice Cream but VETERINARIAN, toward the dolphin. MollY Dwayne, I never want to see you again in my entire life! Youre a terrible person. And ugly too! DWAYNE But-- but Molly! Im sorry! It wasnt supposed to happen this way! Molly storms off. DwayNE (contd) Molly!!! Dwayne and Perry are left alone. Perry looks at his WATCH. Perry Dang, it looks like no Klingon vs. Cardassian trading cards for us. DWAYNE Perry, youre a son of a bitch! PERRY Dwayne, it wasnt my fault. As I recall, it was your sign that killed the dolphin. Dwayne is so angry hes practically shaking. He stares at Perry. Perry this isnt the time to mess with him. Perry (contd) Touche. He walks off, leaving Dwayne standing alone. Dwayne is a broken man. Fade to black. 000200000BE900006300BE3,Fade in: INT. dwaynes living room - that night Dwayne is sitting alone on his the couch, watching TV. NewSCASTER This morning, the lovable new dolphin at the Sheffield Aquarium was brutally attacked by an area middle school student. Dwayne rhino boy Johnson was on a field trip at the aquarium when he attempted to murder Dexter the dolphin with a large cardboard sign. Fortunately, the crazed thirteen-year-old was unsuccessful. Dexter is now in stable condition at the Midfield Vetrinary Clinic, thanks to the anonymous help of a stranger dressed as an ice cream man. The stranger administered blowhole CPR and various other resuscitation techniques on the dolphin. For several hours. We here at Station 3 News salute this ice cream man for his selfless act of heroism. Dwayne turns off the TV. Dwayne Friggin Channel 3. He looks out the window and sees Molly in the street with none other than Ice Cream Man. Ext. Street - OUTSIDE OF DWAYNES HOUSE (Continuous) Molly wearing a shirt that says I <3 Ice Cream Man and fawning over him. MollY Ice Cream Man, youre so brave! Would you like to go to the school dance with me? Ice creAM MAN Sure thing, little girl. Why dont you hop into my sprinkle wagon and well go for a ride. Would you like some ice cream for the road? MOLLY Yeah, do you have any banana ice cream? ICE CREAM MAN You bet I do. You know, banana is the yellowest ice cream. MOLLY Oh, Ice Cream Man! Int. Dwaynes living room (continuous) Dwayne has been watching this through the window. Upon hearing Ice Cream Mans yellowest pick-up line actually work, he slaps himself on the forehead in frustration. Dwayne Damn it! Cut to: Credits. As the credits roll, a shot of Mollys answering machine fades up. The following plays under the credits: MoLLYS VOICEMAIL Hi, its me, Molly, if you want to talk about field hockey or boys, please leave a message and Ill get right back to you. If you want to ask me out on a date, leave your name, number, annual income after taxes, approximate body type and favorite flavor of ice cream and Ill have my people contact you about the application process. Bye! DWAYNE Hi Molly, its me again. Hey listen, about that whole dolphin thing, Im really sorry, I didnt realize that you would be scared of a passed out dolphin. Then again, Id probably be scared of it too if it were staring right at me. Not that Im a scaredy cat or anything. Im very brave. The other day I accidentally hit a wasp nest with my horn and they all came after me but I stood my ground because Im not afraid of any bees. (beat) Speaking of bees, theres a big honey convention two towns over this weekend. Im really excited because I really like honey. Did you know that its good for your voice to eat honey? I found that out a few days ago and I was really surprised. PERRY (voice coming from off screen) Hey! Dwayne, what are you doing? Are you leaving a message? Get off of that phone right now! Its for your own good. DWAYNE Oops, gotta go, bye! CUT TO: THE 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(O.S.) (O.C.) (CONT'D) (SUBTITLE)sTTR CUT TO: FADE IN: FADE OUT. FADE TO: DISSOLVE TO: BACK TO: MATCH CUT TO: JUMP CUT TO:FADE TO BLACK.Key: 15 minutes laterbsTSI=INTEXTI/E] SCHOOL HALLWAY SCHOOL CLASSROOMDWAYNES HOUSE&"STREET - OUTSIDE OF DWAYNE'S HOUSE AQUARIUMAQUARIUM - DOLPHIN TANKDWAYNE'S HOUSE STREET CREDITS.%!DWAYNE'S LIVING ROOM (CONTINUOUS)rsTST DAY NIGHT AFTERNOON MORNING EVENING LATER MOMENTS LATER CONTINUOUS THE NEXT DAYOUTSIDE OF DWAYNE'S HOUSEmCRO9INTINT. Scene Heading01119EXTEXT. Scene Heading01128I/EI/E Scene Heading0113@DAY - DAY Scene HeadingAction0114DNIGHT - NIGHT Scene HeadingAction0115HSUNRISE - SUNRISE Scene HeadingAction0116DMAGIC - MAGIC Scene HeadingAction0117GCONT continuing ParentheticalDialogue0118JINTER interrupting ParentheticalDialogue0119$000GCUTTOCUT TO: Transition Scene Heading1111EFADEINFADE IN:Action Scene Heading1112KFADEOUT FADE OUT. 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